yourmistakes wrote:MrWho I was hoping you could help me with a life-long problem of mine. I'm always tripping over my beef thermometer and dragging it on the ground, resulting in rug burns (the bad kind). It seems to me that when I'm not using my ankle spanker, it's always in the way or uncomfortable. Is there anything I can do to lessen the burden of my bald-headed yogurt dispenser? Many have suggested a reduction, but I am not scarring my fandangled mandangler any sooner than I would cut off an arm.
There is much to discuss about this but before we start let's use a more child friendly name for the "ankle spanker", let's call it "the big P".
First of all, when talking about the big P, we need to take a look at human evolution and how we came to be on this planet. Don't believe any of the scientific bullshit which says we come from apes and stupid stuff like that. You have to be an idiot to think men evolved from some hairy monkeys. If that was true then I'd ask the stupid scientists one question (to which they won't have the answer): "If men evolved from monkeys why can't we suck our own reproductive organs like monkeys do?" (
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1d1MqXWYHM ). Now that we got that stupid evolution theory out of the way, let me tell you how things really went down on planet earth:
In the beginning there were no humans, the earth was crawling with big Ps, they were everywhere, just like a bunch of snakes (only with no eyes), i know it's hard to imagine but here is a picture:
http://images.tribe.net/tribe/upload/ph ... bc9da282ad. Now after a while evolution kicked in, living organisms evolve to suit their needs, so out big Ps needed legs to walk faster and run so they started evolving legs. After a million years, they needed hands to catch food and scratch their ballsacks, so if you follow me on this idea we will get to the point where, after milions of years of evolution, the big Ps ended up with evolving a human to suit their needs.
If you think about it for a moment you will realise that the most precious thing a man has is his P. In every sport we wear protective gear and are always careful not to damage or hurt our P. That's because the big P is actually protecting itself, it is telling us subconciously what to do. In fact our whole lives and our decisions are actually taken by our Ps but, like i said before, we don't realise it.
Now, regarding your question, I could start writing 100 pages of advice here but I think it's better if I recommend a book that I read and it helped me a lot with my huge P problems. I will attach a picture, hope it helps.
You're welcome.
i'm ready to answer another question and help another soul, shoot away.
