Right, here we go: fun for everyone.

[confuciousnz]

We're going to have a little contest.

Whoever wants to enter simply has to go to omegle.com, start a conversation, and eventually post the chat log in this thread.
Make it as interesting as you can. Lie, cheat, scare, whatever it takes.

Winner gets a nice prize package:
One [1] fruit basket, as known on the IRC channel.
One [1] pair of Snow Goggles.
Many [lots] internetz.


[if you copypasta, you're disqualified].

Go on then! http://www.omegle.com

Competition ends 1st February. Just keep trollin', trollin', trollin'.
Here's an example:

You: hey
Stranger: my sister is laughin in her sleep and its creepy
Stranger: lol
You: and how old's she?
Stranger: she will be 11 in 2 days
You: NOTICE TO PARTICIPANT: The Central Intelligence Agency has logged a record of this chat along with the IP addresses of the participants due to violation of United States federal law. VIOLATION: Solicitation of a minor. IMPORTANT: If you believe this chat to be logged in error, please state your reasons to the C.I.A. Monitoring agent observing this chat and quote reference number 3744956127. Failure to do so within the next 2 minutes will result in your IP address being entered in our criminal database and prosecution. Your IP address has been recorded by the Child Internet Service Protection Agency. Please wait while reference code 3744956127 is entered into the database.
Stranger: fail
Stranger: do u see that
Stranger: ?
Stranger: how old is she?
You: see what?
Stranger: this:
Stranger: NOTICE TO PARTICIPANT: The Central Intelligence Agency has logged a record of this chat along with the IP addresses of the participants due to violation of United States federal law. VIOLATION: Solicitation of a minor. IMPORTANT: If you believe this chat to be logged in error, please state your reasons to the C.I.A. Monitoring agent observing this chat and quote reference number 3744956127. Failure to do so within the next 2 minutes will result in your IP address being entered in our criminal database and prosecution. Your IP address has been recorded by the Child Internet Service Protection Agency. Please wait while reference code 3744956127 is entered into the database.
You: that?
You: oh that.
Stranger: yaaa. wat is that?
You: yeah, I get this when I type stuff :<Under law 153:276:935 section 864, Omegle is required to inform you that the person you are currently chatting with owns the IP address of a registered sex offender. Please be careful when chatting with this person, and remember never to give out your personal information. The person you are chatting with cannot see this message.>
You: but I'm not a pedo, she was 13 but she wanted it!
Stranger: oh god!
Stranger: u r a pedo!!!!!
You: what?
Stranger: ur gonna burn in hell sicko
You: No!!
You: Don't worry, she liked it!

[meway]

you win...

You are now chatting with a random stranger say hi
You: If you where an STD what would it be?
Your conversation partner has disconnected

[hewhohasalongname]

Omegle
Talk to strangers!
4638 users online
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi random stranger
Stranger: hi random stranger
You: how awfuly random of you ... being all that... random
Stranger: i am now chatting with you
You: you are indeed!
Stranger: i have said hi
Stranger: WHAT DO I DO NOW?
You: you eat cake of course
Stranger: Omegle needs more instructions
Stranger: sounds good
Stranger: but...i have no cake
You: I am confused, did you just say the cake was a lie?
You: THE CAKE WAS NO LIE!!!
Stranger: oh no
Stranger: i guess you played portal?
You: no one ever finish that game... they don't know it's not a lie
You: it's not you see... the computer is friendly.
Stranger: i didnt finish it, i played it for 15 minutes
You: now what is this portal you speak of?
Stranger: a portal to the neverworld
Stranger: where angels lose their way
You: do cows grow on trees there?
Stranger: no
You: what a horrible place...
Stranger: there's just lots of rocks and skeletons
Stranger: a few canyons
Stranger: vultures
You: oh that sounds like canada
Stranger: its always 11pm
Stranger: yes, now you mention it, it does
Stranger: wow
Stranger: everything just makes sense, doesnt it?
You: excluding the reason you exist.
You: I mean in a perfect world we would all be cows
Stranger: yes
You: and thus we wouldn't exist because in a perfect world we would be in canada
Stranger: i agree with your hypothesis
You: and in canada there are no cows!
Stranger: wha...
Stranger: OH MY GOD
Stranger: MUM WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
You: she took out the knife didn't she?
You: that old hag
Stranger: she just killed Billy
Stranger: he was my best friend
Stranger: and now he's dead
You: it's sad.... but you can always buy a new sock puppet
You: unless of course... you don't live in canada... home of the sock puppet...store...thing....
Stranger: but, i made billy
Stranger: he took hours
Stranger: and i dont live in canada
You: NO! OBEY ME!!! move to canada!!!
You: of course you first have to go through a test
Stranger: what test?
Stranger: i was not informed of any test
You: I know it's going to be hard for you, but you have to eat a tree-grown cow while blindfolded, and you have to do it while singing the cake song
Stranger: okay
You: oh and you must eat your mother's corpse
You: EAT IT!
Stranger: done
Stranger: wow, that was easy
Stranger: now to CANADA
You: LIES!!! LIES!!!! you cannot be accepted!!!!!!
Stranger: But...i ate the cow
Stranger: i sang the song
Stranger: I WORE THE BLINDFOLD
You: an error has emerged out of the bits and bytes of this interwebs , canceling your rights to be canadian, you are now butter toast.
Stranger: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
You: your mother called! she said all your base are belong to us and as such you don't even qualify for this chatter!
You: you sir do not have a base!!!
Stranger: man, just keep dragging out the Chocolate Cupcake memes
Stranger: have i lost the game yet?
You: we did not play a game, this is really how people become canadian nowadays
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HE PLAYED ALONG FOR THAT LONG!
seriously what's wrong with people?

[Lizandra]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello
You: hello
Stranger: who are you?
You: i'm someone
Stranger: elaborate
You: someone of the homo sapiens species
Stranger: ok
sex?
You: does it really matter?
Stranger: no
but id like to know
if you dont wanna answer its ok
Stranger: age?
You: i don't have a sex
You: i lost it in the war
Stranger: what was it before the war?
when you were born
You: i don't remember, my mom said i might be a boy but she couldnt actually confirm since "it" was very small =(

THIS WAS COOL

[hewhohasalongname]

seriously I found a new hobby...
well I won't post any more of those so it won't become a spam but thank you whoever made this site


Stranger: hi
You: hi T_T
Stranger: how are u=?
You: I am upset because some guy figured he needs to disconnect just because I was talking about sock puppets, canada and crazy memes
Stranger: xD
Stranger: m or f?
You: sadly I am not kidding, people nowadays are just sick
You: megazord or fortress? I'll go with the fortress
Stranger: what?
You: what yourself
Stranger: im a mal
You: you asked the question I answered it!
Stranger: e
Stranger: yes but i dont understand that Chocolate Cupcake
Stranger: with fortress
You: well... a fortress is a pretty damn good place to be at while your town is under siege
You: while a megazord is on the front lines...
You: so you'll be far from safe
Stranger: and now? male or female?
You: I am an alpha male.
Stranger: ohh
You: with some tests I'll be ready for beta
Stranger: wtf are u crazy xDDD
You: I ensure you I am perfectly sane.
You: so which weapon are you specializing at?
Stranger: idk
Stranger: dick
You: what would that be?
Stranger: my dick
Stranger: thats my weapon
You: data initializing cannon key?
Stranger: yes sure
You: those are pretty rare, I heard they jam up zords in seconds
Stranger: yes of course
Stranger: u heard right
You: but you'll be pretty much an easy frag if you were ever attacked by 3 of them at once, 4 at most if you are really skilled
You: aren't you scared?
Stranger: no
Stranger: turkisch boys arent scared
You: this planet needs more people of your sort
Stranger: yes right ur right man!!
You: you are a thanksgiving dinner?
Stranger: no thx
You: but you still have 9 months to live!
Stranger: hmmm
Stranger: why
You: well if you want to be chopped and served now...
You: I didn't know oversized chickens can use advanced weapons...
You: you must be proud
Stranger: no
You: how so?
Stranger: what is ur weapon?
You: well since I do enjoy a good fortress my obvious weapon of choice is the new electrical based omega-shock-cannon
You: it does a very good job and has quite the range
You: sadly it's power only matches it's energy consumption and it must only be fired under a true emergency
You: but truly, this is bound to keep away the enemy from our capital
You: so what's your unit's serial number?
You: I belong to TR3902c
You: recently promoted to squad captain while at it!
You: other than our cannon we are in charge of gathering information about the enemy's movement
You: if you read the news, then the grand shipment of zords that was nuked last week was all thanks to our work!
You: still there large chicken soldier?
You: are you facing an attack right now? do you require backup?
Stranger: yes
You: what are your co-ords?
You: holy Chocolate Cupcake, talk to you later maybe, I am under fire here, please send help to (3293,2932,50)

[Lizandra]

Stranger: turkisch boys arent scared
You: you are a thanksgiving dinner?
Stranger: no thx
You: but you still have 9 months to live!
Stranger: hmmm
Stranger: why
You: well if you want to be chopped and served now...
You: I didn't know oversized chickens can use advanced weapons...



Stranger: what is ur weapon?

I just can't stop

[confuciousnz]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi, m or f?
You: f
Stranger: Horny?
You: but my dick's real small.
Stranger: Haha
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Strange. That one didn't disconnect straight away.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: r u older than 21 and live in ct
You: No, I'm not from CT, I'm from the FBI.
You: Please get off the internet.
Stranger: FBI
If the above message says you have been reported to the FBI, it is not legitimate. Please ignore it.
You: Yes, the FBI.
Stranger: why does my things say If the above message says you have been reported to the FBI, it is not legitimate. Please ignore it.
If the above message says you have been reported to the FBI, it is not legitimate. Please ignore it.
You: We're recruiting in your neighbourhood. There should be a van pulling up outside your location.
You: Please hop in.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

OP edited, I totally forgot a finish date for the world's worst competition.

[Lizandra]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: greetings from the moon, you are now being observed from space
Stranger: greetings brethren
Stranger: i am!
You: you are!
You: you've got to choose now: red or blue
Stranger: i better get my camara!
You: you wont need it
Stranger: i like blue
You: so you've chosen blue
Stranger: so i have
You: blue=earth destruction
Stranger: that not good
You: it is
Stranger: how so?
You: we are making room for a new planet
You: red= earth destruction too
Stranger: 'O'
You: so you've got no choice
Stranger: amazing
You: say goodbye to your life!
You: *laser cannons* - target
Stranger: bye
You: *ppppppppppppffffffffffffffffffffffffffff*
You: BOOOM!

this was really stupid....that was what came down to my mind....but i must say you are very talented

[confuciousnz]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: m/f
You: f
Stranger: naked pics?
Stranger: hello?
You: sure
You: lemme take one. can you waittwo minutes?
You: pleaaase? but after, you've gotta show me yours!!
Stranger: ya
Stranger: k
You: thank god my dad got us faster internet.
You: this used to take me ages.
You: you got one ready too?
Stranger: ya
You: show me first, I'm the girl!
Stranger: exactly
Stranger: u
Stranger: go
Stranger: 1
Stranger: st
You: no, I can't safely post this link here trust me, I'm doing you a favour
You: sorry, the imagebucket link was waaay too long.
You: can you see it?
Stranger: hold yp
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I'm such a horrible person.

EDIT: I just realised that so many of my conversations with strangers start with "horny" or "asl" or "you female?". Why can't my life be like this XD

[hewhohasalongname]

I'm such a horrible person.

EDIT: I just realised that so many of my conversations with strangers start with "horny" or "asl" or "you female?". Why can't my life be like this XD

seriously? you seriously want that every 4 out of 5 conversations in your life would be with a 13 years old boy who just discovered he has a plynpom? SERIOUSLY?!

it's so horribly rare finding a person to play with there... I had that crazy "pedos are awesome" chatter last night, may have suited your taste in bad jokes more

I also tried to continue to part 3 of the conversation I posted, introduced myself as a solider under fire in section such and such and asked for backup but people seem to disconnect instantly.


well EDIT, attempted a pedo conversation, it went oddly well, but is far shorter than the good one I had:
You: hi I am a pedo, wanna show me your naked picture?
Stranger: m or f
You: female pedo
Stranger: .d
Stranger: msn
You: how old are you?
Stranger: 18
You: do you have younger brothers or sisters? about 10?
Stranger: no
Stranger: your msn
You: but I am a pedo, I can't deal with you, you are old and nasty
Stranger: age
You: 30
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

he d/c because I am 30, he didn't seem to mind me being a pedo
open minded people are great

here is a slightly longer one, scared that little guy?girl? right off

You: hello asl?
Stranger: It's-a-meeee~~ MA-RI-O~~
Stranger: unknown/male/mushroom kingdom
You: damn
You: you see... I am a pedo, let's have wild sex, are you younger than 10? if so , show me to your naked pictures, otherwise drop dead you jerk
Stranger: 10?
You: and since... you are not under 10
Stranger: too old
You: I can't violate you
You: because you are nasty
Stranger: i am 12 and wat is this?
You: eww 12?
You: any younger boys or girls in the family?
Stranger: wat
Stranger: i am girl
Stranger: my father says if he do me in shower and slicks my hair back
Stranger: it is like 9 year old boy
You: well maybe I can go with that
You: so how about naked pictures mr 9 years old boy?
Stranger: STAR
You: star?
Stranger: stay frosty
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[confuciousnz]

seriously? you seriously want that every 4 out of 5 conversations in your life would be with a 13 years old boy who just discovered he has a plynpom? SERIOUSLY?!

it's so horribly rare finding a person to play with there... I had that crazy "pedos are awesome" chatter last night, may have suited your taste in bad jokes more

I also tried to continue to part 3 of the conversation I posted, introduced myself as a solider under fire in section such and such and asked for backup but people seem to disconnect instantly.


well EDIT, attempted a pedo conversation, it went oddly well, but is far shorter than the good one I had:
You: hi I am a pedo, wanna show me your naked picture?
Stranger: m or f
You: female pedo
Stranger: .d
Stranger: msn
You: how old are you?
Stranger: 18
You: do you have younger brothers or sisters? about 10?
Stranger: no
Stranger: your msn
You: but I am a pedo, I can't deal with you, you are old and nasty
Stranger: age
You: 30
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

he d/c because I am 30, he didn't seem to mind me being a pedo
open minded people are great

here is a slightly longer one, scared that little guy?girl? right off

You: hello asl?
Stranger: It's-a-meeee~~ MA-RI-O~~
Stranger: unknown/male/mushroom kingdom
You: damn
You: you see... I am a pedo, let's have wild sex, are you younger than 10? if so , show me to your naked pictures, otherwise drop dead you jerk
Stranger: 10?
You: and since... you are not under 10
Stranger: too old
You: I can't violate you
You: because you are nasty
Stranger: i am 12 and wat is this?
You: eww 12?
You: any younger boys or girls in the family?
Stranger: wat
Stranger: i am girl
Stranger: my father says if he do me in shower and slicks my hair back
Stranger: it is like 9 year old boy
You: well maybe I can go with that
You: so how about naked pictures mr 9 years old boy?
Stranger: STAR
You: star?
Stranger: stay frosty
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Very nice, very nice. I recognise a failed troll in your last log. The whole STAR, TEXAS thing is something called Omegle Warfare. Good times when you actually bump into another troll.

[hewhohasalongname]

ok here is another one I used your CIA thing to end it, and then I laughed like mad
"pedo conversation, the other way around"

Stranger: hi
Stranger: ?????????
You: I like ponies
Stranger: m/f?
You: and rainbows
You: girl
Stranger: i like loda in chut
Stranger: wanna hav
You: do you like rainbows?
Stranger: ??
You: what is loda in chut?
Stranger: lodo is lund
Stranger: loda
You: I don't understand....
Stranger: u knw chut???????
You: no! you speak english?
Stranger: ya
Stranger: i can
Stranger: i like rainbow
You: then do with the english mister!
You: I like rainbows too
Stranger: i was talking about cock nd pussy
Stranger: in hindi
Stranger: ??/
You: you mean the place you go pee from?
You: that is nasty!
Stranger: loda means cock
Stranger: nd chut means pussy
Stranger: got????
You: sometimes I rub my chut and it feels nice, why is that?
Stranger: u want chudna
Stranger: here chudna means Duck
You: what is Duck?
Stranger: u want to get chudna by a loda
Stranger: Duck is sex
Stranger: got???
You: sex?
Stranger: ya
Stranger: ?
You: sorry I am a little young I don't get it
You: what is sex?
Stranger: how old r u?
Stranger: u know cock?
You: I am 9
Stranger: nd pussy
Stranger: ??
You: yes it's where boys pee pee from!



NOTICE TO PARTICIPANT: The Central Intelligence Agency has logged a record of this chat along with the IP addresses of the participants due to violation of United States federal law. VIOLATION: Solicitation of a minor. IMPORTANT: If you believe this chat to be logged in error, please state your reasons to the C.I.A. Monitoring agent observing this chat and quote reference number 3744956127. Failure to do so within the next 2 minutes will result in your IP address being entered in our criminal database and prosecution. Your IP address has been recorded by the Child Internet Service Protection Agency. Please wait while reference code 3744956127 is entered into the database.
You: but what is sex?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I bet he peed his pants XD

[Kage]

Ummm... this topic keeps getting creepier and creepier....

[baseballboy]

Ummm... this topic keeps getting creepier and creepier....

+1

[confuciousnz]

Ummm... this topic keeps getting creepier and creepier....

+1

It could TOTALLY be G-rated and friendly, but since most people on omgle are either
a) looking for "love"
b) looking for "lulz"
c) using copypasta to paste something similar to this three-point guide,
things are bound to end the way they do.

ALTHOUGH, I did have a rather nice conversation with an Australian, who apparently just likes "making friends" and "talking" on Omegle.
Oh, and mostly Asians who come onto Omegle looking to practice their engrish. And somehow picked up most of the "asl" vibe and rolled with it.